in my mind,
and probably in my arteries.
but unfortunately it is not something i can discuss.
i remember that bag at the end of american beauty,, when i first watched it i found it so sad,,., i feel like that. . i am floating but suddenly caught,, in the silent... thick air and thick it is to the extent that i cannot breathe or see outside it... unable to escape just caught and tangled upon its weave, waiting for something to push me i guess, to get me out!! but i dont know if i can trust anyone to.. how can i expect someone to help me when i cant help myself.. so now i lie here in the repitition of distress and torture which m sure will only result to my death,,, then no one will be able to tell who was ........ who was she,, and what kind of life or ambition did she have??... such things makes me sad.. i do not know if i care too much is it inhumane to cry over little things, something which people would laugh at yet it seems that it has taken ahold of me.. and now this is my life.. my biography will lead a sad unfulfilled story.but it doesnt mean i am a saddd person. just that there are more then u can see, more then u may know and no body i can tell or nobody to understand, in fear i lie in silence, but knowing it must end i am writing today to unclog my brain. thank you.